Fed up with the Job Ads

I am fed up with the job search. I am tired of interviews. I am sick of looking at the pitiful section of paper that calls itself the Help Wanted ads. I am beginning to hate Craigslist though it is a wonderful site for those of us that are unemployed.

These are my Craigslist Job ad bitches-

1.If I see one more misspelling in an ad, I am loading the .32 and teaching someone to use Spell Check. “aplication” “manger”

“bylingual” .

2. DO NOT YELL AT ME. THIS WILL NOT MAKE ME WANT TO WORK FOR YOU. For the love of God, Buddha, The Goddess, The Great Spirit, take the caps lock off!

3. Grammar. One should think carefully before typing, “passed.” Should that really say “passed” or “past”?

4. DOE, BOE, TBD are not rates of pay. A rate of pay is a dollar amount, not an abbreviation for “We will decide to pay you the lowest dollar amount that we think we can get away with.”

5. Job location- Austin. We know the job location is in Austin. We want to know what part of Austin this job is in. I live in Buda. I am 13 miles south of Austin. Why on earth would I submit a resume to a company located on IH-35 and Grand Avenue Parkway? That is what? A good 30 miles from my house?

6. Why do I need a degree to be an Administrative Assistant? What do I need a degree in? And you will pay me what for that?

7. Non-Smokers only need apply. I can see where this would make sense in some employment positions but in a back office, such as in a filing clerk position? As long as I am not molesting kids or shooting up, why is it your business what I do on my break?

8. Why are some of these people asking for a photo? That’s just nuts. Are we basing job performance on looks or age?

9. Again- bilingual only.

Pitches

jobs.jobs.jobs.

I am supposed to "pitch" an idea that might be beneficial to you. hmmmmm

just shootin from the hip....

1. go for a sales job

2. lie (just a tad) you do have a maters dgree from UT

3. Belly Dance

4. Sell art

5. Sell stuff on Ebay

6. become one of those bloggers that make 40k per month

7. become a "hitwoman" it's really fast / easy money ;)

8. hell, win the lottery

9. blackmail someone

10. become a politician and take bribes, it's the american way

or, I would be willing to check out your resume and see if we have any connections out in Austin for you. Let's network, and help each other out that's why we're here. FYI I am in Dallas ;)

pitched by : :::that b!tch:::

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correction: *masters ;) and *degree

yeah, we need spell check on bitchy betty huh!! lol

pitched by : :::that b!tch:::

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I'd love to be a madam.

Hit woman would be great. I am really good with a rifle.

Artist....would people buy drawings of stick people?

I can be a spell checker for BitchyBetty!!

pitched by : rebelene13

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I heard you there.

I am graphic designer, but working in a warehouse. And when I see the signs in the store with big mistakes that p..(bip) me off.

And they put people that are not even appropriate for the position they are in. Like me - I don't even know how to operate a forklift that is the half of the work in warehouse.

Bilingual - yeah sure!!! If I have a degree in french as a second language??? euhhh ...
What about a learning in the street english as a second language?
Nobody seem to concern that my natal language is french. Nooooo need a degree in french.

What about my degree in design? what about my abilities that I got in alot of freelance jobs?

Sometimes the best is to start our own business, with a bit of imagination, and alot of determination.

I can't really help for Texas I am in Louisiana.

Sending you positive thoughts, and Good luck.

pitched by : rednecktielle

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You know how I feel about the stupid ads on Craigslist! I've gone so far as to correct their damn ads in bold red italics and send them back to them!!! I figure I don't care who I piss off, I don't want to work for anyone posting an ad like that anyway!

Here's my "helpin' ya out" part... send me your resume. For real... I recently re-evaluated mine & then decided to put my creative writing & graphic design background to good use & created an awesome resume unlike anything I've ever seen before. It doesn't look like a resume & it gets attention! I've had more interviews with this one & more compliments than I ever did with the previous version. It says basically the same crap... it's just more eye catching & says it in a more linguistically artistic way! ;)

pitched by : MandyStroyer

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